Life and Death: Who Am I

I haven't gone through a phase where everything goes slow motion for a looong time... I used to have this melancholic feeling back in 2005 but during the long break, I was again faced with the mortality of my loved ones...

my tita Dora, whom I loved so dearly and always regard as my second mom since she's the one who always accompanied me to my entrance exams, prepared our packed foods whenever we travel to Manila...and always assisted my mom in every gathering and hospitalizations... is now facing a stage 4 bone cancer. It's very difficult for me to watch her unable to walk =_(

my dear tito Mar suddenly got a brain tumor and their family albeit their wealth was put through trying times as well. He was now recovering after the procedure and an agonizing decision which my Aunt Venus had to go through with him over the long break.

my beloved Papa... albeit being physically active (daily walks and tennis in the mornings and sometimes even in the afternoon...) without feeling the least bit pain in his chest, was suddenly ordered by the head of cardio to not exhaust himself and to make a decision whether to undergo a heart bypass or angioplasty.. both dangerous and both don't have 100% success rate which therefore put our entire family... (including my brother who rarely calls from the US) on edge

As I reflect on what's happening to our clan, I was constantly being reminded of my very first Biblical Foundation 1 Class on Heaven and Hell through the example of Lazarus and the Rich Man and was comforted today by this song from Casting Crowns..

What do all of these mean God?

Who Am I

by Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

lyrics taken from lyricsbox.com